It wasn’t until I was depleted and had no more to give that I learned the importance of saying NO. Last week I was talking to one of my good friends when she expressed to me some of the things that weigh heavy on her heart. These are things that seem to bother her more often than not. As I listen to her through the tears I can’t help but reflect on times where I too have felt the heaviness that she was feeling in that moment. I said to her strongly, honey you’re going to have to learn the art of saying No!
No? But, I have so many roles to fulfill! I’m a mom, wife, daughter, sister, an employee at a job that can give two craps about me or my personal struggles. I interrupt her. Stop! Just stop! Hear me and hear me good, if you do not start saying NO to some of the things that are pulling on you daily, you are going to lose it! Period.
Sweatshirt: H&M/ Pants: H&M (old)/ Boots: Ann Taylor/ Earrings: Kate Landry/ Bag: Dillards
But how? I’m “too nice” my heart is “too big”! LADY, I don’t think you’re hearing me. Stop! It’s a must, it’s a must for your health, for your mental space at this point. Let me ask you if you were to get sick from everything that you carry, what good would you be for your children, for your husband, for your job? At this point, I can tell she is starting to take heed to my words and she starts to calm down. She begins apologizing over and over. I’m so sorry for all of this that I am putting on you. I tell her no need for the apologies. Your issue is this, you’re dehydrated. You have been filling up all of the cups in your life and now you don’t have anything else to give.
This is not a safe place for you to be sis. It’s not. So, today and going forward, I need you to incorporate the word “NO” into your vocabulary. You’ll still be a nice person with a big heart after you do.